Why we hate High School Proms
Proms. The most unflattering American export since obesity and Donald Trump. America’s tradition of opulence at every corner shows no sign of abating. In fact it’s growing rapidly much like their BMI. With over 80 million pound spent on limos and prom attire and parties last year alone in the UK this much adored tradition has hit our shores and our pockets and it seems to be careering out of control much Like Kayne’s finances/ Kim’s booty.
The whole point of Prom is to celebrate the passing of one term year to the next. I guess in some parts of America that signifies a massive achievement(telling) and therefore warrants an event which is best described as an awkward party where spotty, horny teens wince in horror as their teachers try and show how ‘down’ they are by twerking frantically like someone having a seizure. Not cool America. Not cool…
Each year a prom king and queen are ‘elected’ by their fellow students. Bullshit. It’s little more than a popularity contest. Each year it is duly won by the dashing desperate Dan resembling square jawed quarter-back from the football team and his bright eyed and usually blonde haired girlfriend who is of course also the head cheerleader.
So the next time you see a bunch of drunken, yet formally dressed teens driving through town garishly leaning out of the windows and sunroofs of over-sized limos screaming and hollering incoherently remember they’ll have spent over a grand on a night they’ll always remember as the night they snogged/shagged that weird guy with the weird thing on his knob! Stay Trashy.